So many ideas, so little time…
Disclaimer: I do not own SVM or TB and intend no copyright infringement. I make no money out of this, I am just a lowly fan who likes the characters and wishes to make my own stories starring them. Well, some of them – others I reserve the right to ridicule and possibly torture – or at least turn over to Pam for torture… Bill, I’m looking at you. You too, Quinn. Pam is waiting for you in the dungeon with her craft supplies and an obscenely large pile of pink bows…
Recommended Age: 18+
Pammie Dearest: This started as a one-shot but has evolved into something else that defies classification. Perhaps a multi-shot? Starring Pam of course, it is based on an idle thought I had about what kind of letters Pam would write if she somehow ended up taking over Dear Abby… Strangely enough, Hannibal Lecter (the Mads Mikkelsen version) has become a recurring character, having moved into the recently-vacated Chez Compton. Where is Bill, you ask? Well, read on to find out his terrible fate!
There is something rather delightful about writing in first-person Pam POV.
Definitely not for the faint-hearted, the weak of stomach or the easily offended.
It’s All in Your Head: A one-shot again starring Pam as she interrogates a certain blonde who may or may not have had a hand in the disappearance of her vintage Eurovision costumes… Also features her lovely maker in a state of semi-undress…
Bigger on the Inside: A one-shot again starring Pam – this time she is on a mission to retrieve Sookie’s food – and Ginger – from her minivan. But who owns the mysterious identical van next to hers? And why does it have a swimming pool when hers doesn’t?
The New Normal: – complete – A multi-chapter fic loosely set after DEA fiasco…. Possibly some TB cross-over cos I’m damned if I can remember what is or what is not ‘canon’ after reading so many fan-fics…
So Sookie has spawned a child with the shifter (sorry people) but he is sick and mysteriously smells like our favourite vampire, so Sookie starts doing the rounds to get hold of some vampire blood, which sends her back into a certain bar and the arms of a certain Viking vampire. Sookie discovers the hidden consequences of using the cluviel d’or, develops some new dae powers and comes to realise what a hideous litany of mistakes she has made in her life – but instead of rescinding invitations or running away, she does something about it. E/S HEA. Sam dies. Sorry Sam fans. *snicker* Okay, I’m not sorry. And Pam says she is awesome, especially that bit when she staples pink bows to Compton’s ass. And elsewhere.
The ‘True’ Series:
Wow look at that! I still can’t believe it!!!
True Viking – a complete multi-chapter fic that is the first in a series of 3. This is a crossover of SVM and Vikings. This came about when I read the Icelandic sagas about Ragnar and his sons, discovering he had a son named Eirek who died in battle and who was not included in the TV show. Well, what if that son had been none other than our favourite Viking?
Sookie inadvertently uses the cluviel d’or to wish for a normal life with her Viking, only to be hurtled back in time to the 9th century and a little village named Kattegut, ruled by one Ragnar Lodbrok. There, she is enslaved initially, but she has of course caught the eye of Eirek Ragnarsson. There are also a few familiar fairies and vampires in this fic. And Lagertha is kick-ass awesome.
True Vampire– a complete multi-chapter fic that is the second in a series of 3, the follow-on from True Viking. So Eirek has been turned by Appius, only to rise from his grave to have his father Ragnar Lodbrok stake the bastard. But now he is a makerless vampire, Sookie has just given birth to the twins he fathered and there’s a god with a grudge after him – Will Eirek devour Ragnar, or will Ragnar turn him into a weapon? And what about Sookie and those babies?
True Gods – a complete multi-chapter fic that is the third in a series of 3, except now I’ve decided to make it a series of 4. This is a continuation of my SVM / Vikings crossover. Sookie’s powers have waned and after attacking Ragnar to protect her daughter Finna, she disappeared, having been sent back to the future and Dear Old Gran in Bon Temps. But why is Compton hanging around, and how the hell did Ragnar end up as vampire king of half the world? What secret is Freyr keeping that will reveal him as a ‘True Asshole’? And will Eric and Sookie find each other again? (of course they will!) And what the hell has Pam found under Gran’s doormat?
True Queens -a complete multi-chapter fic that is the fourth in a series of 3… Wait, series of 4. This is Lagertha’s tale, exploring her mysterious origins (and by default Eric’s). Just exactly who or what is the famed shieldmaiden’s mother, Thorgerd Shinebright? And what about her freaky aunt Irpa Darkheart? This story will fill in some of the gaps in True Gods such as Ragnar’s rise to power as vampire king of half the world, Lagertha’s turning by her lover Thor and whatever happened to old Queen Sophie Anne and her beloved progeny? Ragnar is of course out to win Lagertha back and resorts to all sorts of foul deeds to do it. Eric, Sookie, Pam etc also appear in the fic, eventually continuing the story beyond the ending of True Gods, and it may or may not involve pirates. Ok, there are pirates – read the prologue. And Pam may or may not fly a pink jolly roger. Actually that’s not in there but I might go back and add it.
Will there be a fifth book in this series of 3? Maybe….
Yes, definitely. True Monsters. Coming your way soon-ish.
The John-Northman Smith / Alias Series:
The Oncoming Storm: A complete multi-chapter fic – it is a Doctor Who / TB crossover focusing on the episodes “Human Nature” and “Family of Blood” from Season 3…. except I’ve changed it so the tenth Doctor’s companion is Rose and the TARDIS sends them to a little town called Bon Temps in Louisiana as they are chased across time and space by the Family of Blood. The Doctor whips out the Chameleon Arch but it malfunctions – and Eric rises one night to find himself with a sideburned progeny he can’t remember turning… No, it’s not Beehl – I am not that cruel. Set just after the Witch War and I am planning on delving into the ‘oncoming storm’ / darker side of the Doctor with some forays into the Time War and probably an appearance from Captain Jack as well. It will also involve an exploration of just why Sookie rejects Bad-Ass Eric in favour of Castrated Eric – oops, I mean Amnesia Eric – and Sookie finds the Doctor’s fob watch, and what’s up with Thalia and the Doctor, and how the hell does Russell fit into this…. Damn – better stop. Giving too much away!
Bringer of Darkness is the second installment of my TB / Doctor Who crossover. This stroy is told in several parts. Will Pam realise her dream of a pink TARDIS? And how has Thalia ended up on Ancient Gallifrey, betrothed to the Timelord – Great Vampire Godric? Oops just gave that one away – hopefully you already read The Oncoming Storm! Sookie and Eric are back in the Viking era when some shiny, suction-cup wielding aliens pay a visit (Exterminate!) and where has Rose ended up and how will the Doctor save her and everyone else now his TARDIS has exploded in a million pieces? And just what is that sneaky Rassilon up to? And will Niall succeed in his dastardly plan to assimilate Timelord technology as he upgrades the fae into Cybermen? And will he ever find his missing eyeball? Sick of my endless questions? Go read the story and I promise I will stop!
Destroyer of Worlds is the third installment in my TB / Doctor Who crossover. Will Pam manage to get the Doctor into those pink orgy pants at long last? And what’s the secret (well not that secret really) backstory on the Doctor and the Master when they were at the Academy? Take a trip through the dome of the Citadel to Low Town and meet the Time Lord outsiders. Find out the history of the Courtesan and her long-lost love. Umm I had too many Godrics so I killed one… But which one??? Will Eric overcome that causality paradox (oops the exploding mountain fell on him when he was human) and why is the Doctor so afraid of Jackie Tyler? And what has Niall upgraded himself into now? Read on and find out.
I haven’t written any more of this series yet, but I could be persuaded…
The Mirror series:
The Christmas Fairy AU. No crossovers in sight but very AU. Multi-chapter fic; complete. A complete re-imaginging of the Eric and Sookie story, with a Godric thrown in for good measure. This was written for the Fangbangers Anonymous Advent Calendar 2016. It has Vikings, fairytale motifs, the fall of Rome, time travel, a monstrous Niall, magic mirrors, stone circles and more Christmas than you can poke a stick at. I wanted to explore some of the pagan origins of Christmas, such as the midwinter solstice, also the Roman Saturnalia, the Feast of Fools and the grinches who banned Christmas…oops, Puritans, and let’s not forget Coca-Cola’s now ubiquitous version of Santa. What if Sookie had known Eric from the start? What if the fae could travel through time at will, without consequence, the same way they travel through space? What if Sookie had been locked up in a tower by an evil Niall and gifted with a magic mirror that was in fact a trap?
Winter’s Shadow AU. Still no crossovers, I promise. This is my Gothic-inspired sequel to The Christmas Fairy with definite homages to Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde and maybe a splash of Frankenstein thrown in for good measure. Does that make it a crossover, or just derivative? Damn, not sure. Will Eric overcome that ominous piece of glitter that floated down from his eye at the end of The Christmas Fairy? And what’s going to happen to Niall now he’s trapped inside the mirror? And what on earth is Pam going to do to Compton??? Read on to find out more!
Mirror, Mirror AU. This is the third fic in the ‘Mirror’ series but please be warned it begins to diverge into E/S/G. If this offends you, please don’t read… But seriously, if you’ve read Pammie Dearest and survived, you should be fine. Pam has headed off to the USA to begin a new life with Suzette, the delicious Alex and Elizabeth…. Except Suzette has taken the cursed mirror and Niall with his Princess Leia bun suideburns with them! Eric, Sookie and Godric will of course follow as Pam goes off on an amazing adventure through an action-packed era of American history… Wars (ok, a war), gold rushes (mentioned in passing, I’m sure), and Wild West frontier towns and maybe the odd outlaw tossed in, a sherrif or two… We will also get some backstory on the origins of the mirror and how it came to be in Niall’s creepy possession. Will Eric get to turn Pam? Will I ever write a fic longer than 25 chapters? Yep, this is the first one to break the curse!
The Green Fairy AU. This is the fourth and probably final fic in the ‘Mirror’ series. Much of it is set in 1870s Paris with definite literary nods to Emile Zola. Pam will finally be turned by Eric, we will find out exactly where Alex has been and with whom, Sookie and Godric are trapped in Faerie and Godric is no longer a vampire!! So much happens in this fic – not sure how to describe it. There will be revolution, courtesans, the Paris Commune, an evil mermaid queen and of course an epic battle!
Flame of the Sea – AH. This is historical fiction that I chose to publish as an Amazon Kindle. Here’s the cover:
Now for the link:Flame of the Sea
And the blurb:
A shield maiden is slaughtered by an English king and an invasion begins.
St Brice’s Day 1002 AD: the Saxon king Aethelred the Unready orders all of the Danes in his land to be slaughtered in an act of genocide. But when Princess Gunhilde, the sister of the Danish King Sweyn Forkbeard is murdered, a blood feud begins that will bring England to its knees.
Caught in this bloodshed is Elswyth, daughter of the thegn of East Anglia Ulfcytel Snillingr, a man who has fled retribution in Gotland for murder. Did he abduct her mother, the Saxon princess and daughter of Aethelred? Or was it a love match? Rumours, innuendo and her father’s feisty temper make it difficult for Elswyth to accept her place as a Saxon princess. So when the dragonships float up the River Ouse to Thetford, their bodies sleek and fat with plunder, their wings flapping against the masts, will it lead to her freedom or her captivity? Fighting for her life against Eadric Streona, the king’s bulldog and smothered in dung to disguise her looks, she uses her skills as a shieldmaiden taught to her in secret to pin the man to the ground. But a tall, fierce-looking Viking warrior is watching her fight. Scrubbing at the muck on her face, why does her heart beat faster when she feels his eyes on her? Just who is Jarl Eirikr Hakonarsson and can she trust him?
Ember of the Waves: Book 2 of Elswyth’s Saga
Again, published on Amazon. Here’s the link: Ember of the Waves
Here’s the blurb:
Standing on the cliffs, Elswyth watches Eirikr Hakonarsson’s dragonship break apart. Aud is missing and Hakon is still a captive of the Danish crown.
Surrounded by Lord Uhtred’s army, her heart as broken as her new husband’s ship, treachery sees her end up on Norman shores in the court of Richard II and future queen of England, Emma. But who is seated in the throne room beside the young Duke?
An enemy, or a friend?
Either way, he says he has married Elswyth by proxy, with her grandfather Aethelred’s permission. How will she escape from the Norman castle before she finds herself in his bed?
Elswyth will sail to Norway, discover a secret, fight two armies and flee to Denmark to rescue Eirikr’s son.
Sigrid the Haughty, burner of men, enchantress and witch, will be waiting for her.
Shine of the Dark – Book 3 in Elswyth’s Saga
Published on Amazon – here’s the link: Shine of the Dark
Eirikr Hakonarsson and Elswyth are finally free to live a happy, peaceful life in an independent Norway.
Or are they?
Half the population of Eirikr’s village have been enslaved by Uhtred, taken to Ladoga to be sold in the slave markets of the east. Cursed as a Saxon, surrounded by rumours of an affair with Canute and the parentage of her child questioned, Elswyth sets out to clear her name. But why is Eirikr annoyed with her for taking matters into her own hands?
From the ashes of the burned longhouse, Canute is reborn. Cursed by the witch Sigrid as she was dying, Canute has become something terrible, a creature beyond all reason, bent on destruction.
When Eirikr journeys to England to take revenge on Uhtred, Elswyth is left alone with their child.
But then a lone dragonship appears on the horizon.
Apparently empty, the back of the beast is weighted down with bones.
Will hers and that of her children be added to the pile?
Lair of the Serpent – Book 4 of Elswyth’s Saga
Published on Amazon – here’s the link: Lair of the Serpent
And here’s the blurb:
Torn between his honour and his family, Jarl Eirikr Hakonarsson embarks on a war he does not want against a man who is not his enemy.
Edmund Ironsides takes up arms against his father Aethelred the Unready in a bloody civil war. Forced to join with his father Sweyn Forkbeard, Canute calls in Hakonarsson’s debt with a talisman.
Smooth and round, heavy with the water, the river stone carved with spidery black runes weighs heavily on Eirikr. Will it give Canute carte-blanche to force him to do his bidding?
And will this stone, carved by Sigrid the Haughty’s hand, keeps Canute’s inner wolf at bay?
But when Elswyth and Emma of Normandy are both abducted with their children, all bets are off.
In the final battle, flying far above the corpse-sea, a mighty old god clings to the back of a dragon once sung into a piece of wood.
Will they bring death to all?
All titles are kennings for gold from Skaldic poetry.
This series is now complete 🙂